Worst Morning Scenario Ever?

So in the ideal world your morning goes smooth. You wake up and get your shit done, get your promotion, get your bonus, meet a smoking hot chick at the bar that night after work when you're with your buddies, you take her home, forget her name but she doesn't care, and do the same shit the next day. That's the life. But wait. That can't happen today. You know why? Because your breakfast is fucked up and now your whole day is ruined and you get fired and you realize you have no friends to meet at the bar and you go home and watch lifetime channel and cry.

This is what happens to me one day every week at the dining hall for breakfast. Something invariably goes wrong and fucks up my day. I stew over it. Can't concentrate on stuff. Step in dog shit. Piss on my leg instead of in the toilet. Like my whole day is just out of whack. One day I'll come in and I can't wait for my bowl of steamy steel cut oats. Ya know what though? No oats. Just a fucking empty fucking metal container with burnt scraps. So I make the best out of the situation, get an omelette or bowl of cereal and I sort of recover. So I go to get my coffee. "Alright Banana's Foster I like that flavor I can dig this," go over to get creamer, push the french vanilla creamer lever and lo and behold. what the fuck, no fucking french vanilla creamer. Now I'm done. Might as well go back to bed and try again tomorrow. No steel cuts and no french vanilla creamer. Hazelnut fucking sucks and I put it in my coffee anyways but it's never the same. Just tastes too god damn hazelnutty. Can't take it.

This kind of day is the worst and don't try and defend it and be like "Oh well just deal with it." I can't. Don't defend shitty days, then you're just the shitty day defender person. You know why this day is going to be shitty? First of all I can't think because I haven't had any carbs from steel cuts to provide my brain with energy to think. I'm basically a walking vegetable. Like ya I'll say hi to you but my brain doesn't even know who you are. Roommate says hi, he might as well be a dinosaur with a tomato for a head. Doesn't compute. Hazelnut flavor is throwing me off. My whole mouth just tastes funny from it. Like how you get a piece of hair in your mouth at a meal and then your meal just never tastes the same and recovers after that. Scary stuff. This sort of day makes me feel like I'm living in communist China. Like just get me the fuck out of there.

Can't think of a worse morning than this. Maybe I'm picky but this is by far the worst shit that can happen to anyone any given day.